The Ten Reasons I’ll Never Have Kids

This kid might look adorable, but in reality, it’s plotting your death.

Some people my age coo over little babies and small children, gushing over how much they want a kid of their own. Me? I avoid kids like the plague. I never want to have any. Here’s why:

The Sunburn From Hell

Yesterday was Independence Day, as anyone in the United States and probably outside of the US knows, I spent the entire day outside.

For those of you who are unaware (this should include just about anyone who reads my blog) I have very pale skin. Very pale skin. If I hold up a piece of printer paper to my stomach, they blend together. Alright, that was a complete exaggeration. But you get the point, yes?

Back to my first sentence. I spent the entire day outside. And, naturally, I forgot to apply sunblock. Usually I’m obsessive with sunblock, but yesterday, I was in one of those “ah, screw it!” moods that teenagers tend to always be in, and I left the sunblock in the car while I ran around in a short pair of shorts and a tee shirt that left my arms almost entirely exposed.

Unfortunately, yesterday was not an ideal day to be in an “ah, screw it!” mood, as the UV index was classified as “very high,” a fact I did not learn until after I was transformed into a lobster.